Product Advice - My Strap-on

The highly anticipated line of Tantus Connoisseur Harnesses has finally arrived! SheVibe just rolled out this new line of five premium leather harnesses, and man, do they look amazing! Their curves and patterns are unlike anything I’ve ever seen on a harness. Red spiderweb patterns? A “Nurse” harness? Oh, the roleplay possibilities! While I appreciate the simplicity of “traditional” solid black leather harnesses, I’m excited to see a fresh and fashionable update from a reputable company. Most impressive to me, though, is that three of these harnesses—the Nurse, Amazon, and EZ—will fit up to 60-inch hips. If you’ve ever taken a look at my Best Plus-Size Strap-ons Guide, you’ll notice that sleek and sexy leather harnesses are all but impossible to find in this size range. I applaud Tantus for adding three more sexy options to the plus-size harness market. The Connoisseur line certainly beats the competition in aesthetics.

As someone who has worn more strap-ons than I can count, I had to know more. After doing some research and exchanging a few emails with Tantus, here is my take on the new Connoisseur line.

Nurse Connoisseur Strap-On Harness

The Nurse Harness is a must-have for anyone into nurse roleplay and strap-ons. Make sure you pair it with a sexy nurse outfit to get the full effect.

A major concern I had about the Nurse, EZ, and Amazon harnesses (more on the other two later) is that they have a permanent O-ring that is 1½ inches in diameter. I mentioned to Jenna over at Tantus that I was concerned that dildos with a smaller diameter may not be stable with this setup. Jenna, however, put my concerns to rest with the following explanation and pictures:

“What you’ll want to watch is the size of the toy’s base, because you’ll want one that’s large enough that it won’t pull through the o-ring. I’d say any toy with a base of at least 2″ would work well. Both the Silk Medium & Silk Small would fall into this category.”

Here is the Nurse Harness with a the Silk Small Dildo (0.8 inch diameter):

Here is the view inside the Nurse Harness. Pictured here is the base of a black Silk Medium Dildo (1-inch diameter):

Even the tiny Silk Small looks like it’s in no danger of slipping out of position. Adjusting the harness so that it’s snug against the body should keep the dildo stable while thrusting. I am satisfied that this O-ring setup would meet most people’s needs, although people who want to use giant dildos or dildos with bulky bases should probably stick with the interchangeable O-ring on the Black Widow.

Black Widow Connoisseur Strap-On Harness

The Black Widow Harness is the other extremely memorable and distinctive harness of the bunch. I love the way the spiderweb in the back dips down just enough to accentuate the butt cheeks, but not far enough to cause discomfort. More important than aesthetics, though, is the interchangeable O-ring and the solid leather backing. This setup lets you equip a wider variety of dildo shapes and sizes than any other harness in the line. Do you like dildos that are monstrously huge or have giant balls? If so, then this is the Connoisseur harness that best suits your needs.

By the way, I’m dubbing Black Widow harness the “Superhero Harness” because the Black Widow name and look reminds me of a larger-than-life comic book character. Imagine the roleplay scenarios: Will you play the heroic mistress who punishes her foes, or the cruel villainess who tortures her prey?

Amazon Connoisseur Strap-On Harness

The wide Velcro belt on the Amazon Harness intrigues me. This strikes me as a comfortable harness that you can quickly throw on for spur-of-the-moment action. Velcro is very underrated and has an undeserved reputation of being “cheap.” Anyone who has ever worn a Velcro harness, though, will tell you that the Velcro will keep your harness snug and secure even if you run a marathon and do gymnastics in it. It’s more forgiving than buckles if you want a skintight grip, especially if you have an unusual body shape. It’s the main reason why I have faith that the permanent O-ring will work well on these harnesses: The easily adjustable Velcro will fit your body like a glove and keep that dildo base nice and snug against your body. UPDATE: Read my Amazon Harness Review for more detailed pictures and insight about this harness.

Nevada Connoisseur Strap-On Harness

The Nevada Harness is my favorite of the Connossieur line primarily because of the aesthetics. I love the brown leather accents, and am disappointed that I don’t get to see this color more often in harnesses or fetish wear. I love the curvy cut in the front and the slim buckles. What a gorgeous harness!

The adjustable O-ring is a nice bonus, but I still think the Black Widow’s leather backing makes it a better fit for those who want to use unusual dildos.

EZ Connoisseur Harness

The EZ Harness is the Nurse Harness without the cosmetic features. What I wrote above about permanent O-rings and Velcro applies here as well. It might not be as flashy as the other harnesses, but its simplicity is still sexy. It’s also about $30 cheaper than everything else in the line except the Nurse harness, which is the same price. A good value if you’re looking for a quality harness without all the glitz.

Which Connoisseur Harness is your favorite? If you own one, then please share your thoughts about it in the comments.

I’ve been part of this lifestyle for many years, and, as you might imagine, a whole pile of dildos has been left behind in my quest for pegging perfection. Every gimmick, shape, material, and texture is represented in my collection, but my favorite, by far, is the least pretentious of all. Tantus Silk Dildos, with their unassuming packaging, and basic style, are simply on a higher “peg”.

Why do I love the Silk so much? There are certain attributes that the perfect pegging dildo must possess, and the Silk has them all. The flared base will fit any harness, with the exception of the small model, which is a hand-held toy only. Its shaft is lightly curved and flexible, but firm enough to provide a satisfying amount of stimulation without slipping. The head is only slightly wider than the base, allowing for easy insertion, and less resistance during vigorous thrusting. That unpleasant “vacuum effect” that plagues some dildos with larger, more bulbous heads isn’t a problem here. As a final point, the texture is silky smooth, with no bumps, ridges, or other distractions. The Silk glides just as well as any glass or metal dildo I’ve ever used. Add a dash of lube and go to town!

Those of you looking for vaginal stimulation need not fret, however, as the Silk has you covered too. In my experience, products designed specifically for G-spot stimulation, with their exaggerated curves or tough material, cause more pain than pleasure. The Silk, on the other hand, can hit just the right spots with the maximum of comfort. It’s just as kind to the G-spot as it is to the prostate.

One of the most important factors when choosing a dildo, or any toy, is its construction. Thankfully Tantus makes all of their dildos from the highest quality American-made, hypoallergenic, phthalate-free silicone. The Silk is also completely tasteless, odorless, and will stand up to boiling and bleaching. It will stand up to the dirtiest, longest, most aggressive play you can throw at it.

I will caution, however, that the Silk is something of a lint magnet. It will start to collect dust as soon as you take it out of the package. This is especially problematic when you lay it on a bed or try to dry it with a towel. I like to give it a quick wash before use, dry the base only, and then stand it upright without drying the shaft until it’s ready to be used. For those spontaneous, spur of the moment times, try keeping a pack of toy wipes near your lube and condoms so that you can quickly wipe it down before use.

Wondering which size to buy? Read on!

Silk Dildo — Size Large (7″ Length x 1.5 “Diameter)

Which Size Silk Dildo Should I Buy For Pegging and Anal Use?

Silk Dildos come in three sizes: Small, Medium, and Large. I’ve put all three through their paces, and have included some additional thoughts below about each size. Most reader inquiries I receive regarding dildos are concerned with anal play, so I’ve limited my comments to that topic. If you’re wondering which size to use vaginally, I recommend the Medium or Large. Silk Small is too slight to provide much vaginal stimulation.

Small (4.25″ Length x 0.8″ Diameter): An excellent anal trainer for those curious about anal play but not yet ready to take the plunge with a larger model. It’s too small to fit most strap-on harnesses, so consider this a handheld toy only.
Medium (5.25″ x 1″): By far the best size to use if you’re new to pegging. It provides a pleasurable and satisfying length and girth while not being too intimidating or too difficult to insert. Compatible with all harnesses.
Large (7″ x 1.5″): For those experienced in receiving anal pleasure. If you’ve never inserted something into your ass before, this model will cause a great deal of discomfort. Start with the Medium. Ass play veterans will find the Large a satisfying upgrade from the Medium without feeling monstrously huge. Compatible with all harnesses.

Available at Tantus and SheVibe.

Wondering what kind of strap-on harness to use with the Silk? Check out my Best Beginner Harnesses Guide and How to Choose a Beginner Strap-on Harness Page for further advice.

The Tantus Connoisseur Strap-on Harness Line: An Overview